Being Thankful

There is just so much to be thankful for in my life that I hate to even start trying to make a list. I mean, there's the biggies, like health, a loving husband, my family, a home, etc. And then there's simple, obvious stuff that we take for granted, right, like electricity and music on the radio, etc.

So that leaves me kinda unsure of where to start. I guess I'll just make a list, and you must know this list is so totally non-inclusive. If something is absent from the list, but present in my life, please don't think this list is some declaration of my unthankfulness of said item!

Here goes.....I am thankful FOR:

• my husband, Jeff
• my kids, Drake and Avery
• my brothers, their spouses and children
• my niece (little sister) Amber...she gets a line of her own
• my Dad and the way our relationship has evolved since my Mom died
• my girlfriends
• my neighborhood...Spring Arbor PRIVATE baby!
• my home and my yard
• my swagger wagon
• my health
• my commitment to a healthier me, and the results that I've seen thus far
• compliments (very closely related to above item!)
• jeans that fit....I mean REALLY fit
• technology...I LOVE me some technology kids
• being able to cook a good meal
• compliments (very closely related to above item!)
• being able to help others
• blogging and readers who leave comments about my blog
• photographs
• comfort and stability
• chaos and insanity
• a warm house and a warm bed
• a fridge full of food in the house and another one full of booze in the garage
• feeling comfortable enough with who I am to be able to say what I mean and mean what I say
• being able to talk to a friend and vent or complain and feel better when I'm done
• snuggling with my kids
• our new dog, Polly
• my cell phone...means my family can reach me anytime, anywhere if they need me
• old friends that have been there throughout the years
• new friends that are so incredible you forget they haven't been around for years
• sarcasm
• comedy
• live theater
• wine
• my treadmill
• honest people
• perspective...although, as in most life lessons, perspective was one gained the hard way, but that lesson has given me such clarity that I am happy to have learned it this early in my life
• my life
• the end of this list

Again, while not all encompassing of the things I'm thankful for, that list represents the top-of-mind-awareness that I could type out in those few minutes. I guess the easiest way to describe it is simply, I am thankful.

I sincerely hope that anyone reading this has a wonderful Thanksgiving, surrounded by good food, great friends, and much laughter.

Enjoy your day....

Be Thankful.....I am......

Happy Birthday, Mom...wherever you are...

Today should be my Mom's 78th birthday. I should've called her today and explained that I'm saving her gift to give her in person when her and Dad come next week for Christmas, only to rush out the day of their arrival to get something...I SHOULD have, but unfortunately, I can't do that any longer.

My Mom died on July 4, 2009, so this is the second time that her birthday has come and no such phone call was made. No last minute flowers were ordered...no "sorry your card is a little late"...no "we have appointments at the spa for next week"...nothing.

Last year I was really, really sad on this day. Before anyone misinterprets, please know that today was difficult, and filled with moments of sadness, but today was not like last year. Last year I was sucked down in a hole of depression and sadness that I was unsure if I would ever come out of. Last year was simply bad.

But, this year is better....better than I would have dared imagine it could be. This year is more reflective than despairing. This year I can focus on all of the wonderful things, and how I appreciate them instead of yearning for nothing more than to have those things back. I understand now that the pain is part of the journey, and sometimes without the pain you are unable to see the beauty in the every day.

Losing so much has helped me see that beauty in every day.

So today, as every day, I have thought much of my Mom. I find myself looking at my kids and thinking how much she would get a kick out of them at this stage, and yet at the same time, thankful that she was able to see what she saw of their lives.

I learned so much from her...and so many of those traits that drove me nuts are the traits I see coming out in my own personality, and suddenly they're not so irritating! She taught (by example, of course) that making people feel welcome and warm in your home is such a wonderful gift to give your friends. I love having people over, and find that I am honestly happiest when the house is full and the party is in full swing...I look around and see smiles, hear laughs, and that is a feeling of complete joy that I know she felt on many an occasion.

She is missed by so many, and not a day goes by that I don't think about her. As a teenager I swore to NEVER be like her, and now, as an adult, I hope that some day my own children look back at me as their Mom and have similar feelings as I do for mine...her death left a void in my life that can never be filled, but her presence in my life was a gift that can never be taken away from me.

Happy Birthday Mom...I love you.

A Time To Be Thankful

November is here...I'm pretty sure it creeped up on me when I was busy doing other things. Weren't we just loading up the wagon and heading to the beach a few days ago? Wow...anyway...Fall is here.

November is many things, but it is the month of Thanksgiving.

Thanks Giving

Giving Thanks

So, thinking about this month got me to this post...since this is a time to give thanks, my blog this month will be focused on those things that I am thankful for. Here I will Give Thanks to the things that I am grateful for.

First, I have to say I am thankful for my family and friends. I can't just talk about family or friends, independent from each other. See, to me, many of my friends are like family, so these terms go hand-in-hand.

My "household" family would be Jeff, Drake, Avery, and our new pup Polly...and for them, I am extremely thankful.

Jeff and I have been married for 15 years, and even though I'm way too bitchy at times he loves me. Many times I reflect back on a day and think of all the times I could've been a little nicer. I hope that after being together for this long he never doubts that I would do anything for him, and I consider our marriage a true partnership in which we each support the other (and all of our crazy ideas) totally and completely.

My kids make my life worth living. They drive me nuts at times, but I love them more and more each day. I love seeing them grow and learn new things. I love seeing their relationship as brother and sister develop. They are so sweet and wonderful, even when they're testing my patience to the n'th degree! I can't imagine my life without them.

Polly is such a sweet dog, and having her in the house reminds me how much we all loved Albus, and of all the gifts he gave to us. Polly has quickly endeared herself to the entire household.

I am thankful for my awesome dad, Dan, and for all of the amazing things he's taught me over the years. After my Mom died, Jeff predicted that Dad and I would become even closer, which, at the time, seemed impossible to me. But, as is often true, Jeff's prediction was correct, and my Dad and I have an even stronger relationship now than before my Mom died. I hope she is able to look down on us and smile that we're all sticking together and getting through this as a family.

I'm thankful for my brothers: Dave, Jeff, and John. Regardless of the age gap they've always been awesome brothers and friends. I love them dearly.

I'm thankful for all those additional family members...nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws, etc. Each of them have played a special part in who I am today, and I treasure the friendship that has grown over the years.

Now, on to my friends...this is more difficult to explain than the family! I have such GREAT friends. My close girlfriends are a treasure worth more than the Crown Jewels. These gals have been there for me through some really rough times and I appreciate their love and friendship more than anyone can imagine. The only way I can ever repay them is simply by being a good friend back. I strive to be that friend every day. Some of these friends I have known since grade school, while some are new to my life in the past few years. Regardless of the timeline, they all have made a mark on my heart. Knowing that you can call up a girlfriend and she's got your back is one of the greatest gifts we can have. There's simply NOTHING like a great girlfriend!

So, that's it for today...I'm showing my thanks for my friends and family. Had I REALLY expressed my feelings...well, the post would be too long! I could list countless examples of how these people have enriched my life, but you'll just have to take my word for it...my friends and family are simply awesome and I'm so very thankful to have them in my life.

Don't Ask....Don't Tell

I'm a big supporter of "Don't Ask....Don't Tell". Really....I am....but the version I believe in has a little spin to it.

My version of "Don't Ask....Don't Tell" is this. I'm not going to ask you if you hate someone because of their sexual orientation, and you had better not tell me that you do, 'cause if you do....well, you're outta my troop.

Seriously. I find it really sad that right now, in 2010, there are people STILL being discriminated against for being gay. REALLY? REALLY? We're hating...still? Haven't we seen that there is no room for hating one another?

I have a lot of friends and a large family. And I love 'em all. I really do...I'm from one of those "Let's hug it out, bitch" families...we're all out there with our feelings for each other. And so, I am that kind of friend (or at least I hope I am!). If I have a friend in need, I'm there. And, thankfully, I have friends that treat me the same way. (Do unto others as you'd have done to you....) And guess what? Some of those friends and family are gay and some are lesbian.

And you know what else? It doesn't matter to me at ALL who my friends and/or family sleep with, marry, live with, date, etc. Really...it doesn't. All I care about is that my friends and family (gay, straight, or somewhere in the middle) are HAPPY. I want them to be HAPPY. That's it.

I love my gay brother and his partner of over 30 years, but I do worry about them. I worry that hate will touch them in some way and they'll think that everyone is like that. I hate haters.

I love my gay cousins, I love my gay friends....male, female, doesn't matter to me. I love 'em all. I love them if they're flaming gay or butch. 'Cause I don't care who you're sleeping with...this is NOT a factor in the qualities that make us friends. I love them because they bring something to my life, just like the straight friends and family that I also love!

Hating someone in the name of Christianity is just WRONG. Whatever happened to "God loves all of His children"? Or was it supposed to read "God loves all of His children....except the gay ones"??? So please, please, please do not tell me that you hate homosexuals in the name of Christianity. Don't Ask....Don't Tell. 'Cause if you tell me that, I'm done with you.

My views are intolerant, which is kinda hypocritical, given the post, right? Well, that's fine with me. I am intolerant of hate, and I'm intolerant of kids being bullied because they're gay....bullied to the point that they take their own lives. What's wrong with us?

So there you have it. I love my friends...all of them. But, I have no room in my life for haters, so if you fall into that category, I promise that I Won't Ask...if you promise you Won't Tell, because if you tell, I'm done.

Think Outside of the Box...

Ugh...this post has been brewing inside for a while. First of all, let me say that I really enjoyed the book "Freakonomics" and it opened my eyes to how much we take what we read, see on TV, or hear in the media as gospel.

I saw this on TV, so it MUST be true........right? They had statistics to back it up.

If you haven't read "Freakonomics" grab a copy and read it...it may change the way you think!

Anyway, at some point in my life between living with a pessimist who believes NOTHING he reads or hears and reading "Freakonomics" I started thinking a little differently about what I see on TV, read in the paper, or hear on the radio.

Which brings me to this post. I had the Brazilian Blowout on my hair a couple of weeks ago. Before going in, I did a little Internet research because I was a bit nervous about my hair's reaction to a chemical treatment. I had a perm (ironic, right....perm and now straighten) in the early 1990's and my hair burned so badly that it just broke off in chunks. I wasn't wanting that to happen again (obviously) so I got on the good old Internet and started researching this Brazilian Blowout.

Wow...there was a LOT of information! And a vast majority of that information was on the whole "does BB have formaldehyde or not" discussion. I'm not going to site sources or provide links, 'cause we're all smart enough to go find it all on our own. BUT, here's what I DID find, and not necessarily in this order, but this makes the most sense.

OSHA in Oregon received an anonymous sample of product that was labeled "Brazilian Blowout" and was asked to test it for formaldehyde. OSHA tested this sample and then published findings that the product does contain high levels of formaldehyde.

Hmmmm....OSHA, right? A government agency couldn't have messed something up, could they? Dig a little more. Many people did not like the whole "anonymous sample" so then I find that a woman steps forward (a salon owner) and says that she was the one who sent the product in. Here's where it gets interesting.

Brazilian Blowout searched their customer files and they don't have this woman or her salon on file as someone they have shipped product to. See, BB is doing something different in the Health and Beauty industry. Most product is sold directly to a distributor, and their sales people visit salons and sell the product to the salon. BB decided to cut the middle man out of the equation and ONLY SELL TO SALONS DIRECTLY. (Hmmm...that didn't piss someone off, did it???) So, since the only way you get the BB product is from BB themselves, they would know if they had sold to this woman or her salon. So where exactly did her sample come from? At this point....we don't know.

So this leads me to the point where I need to make a decision...my BB is the day AFTER I have found all of this information. According to the BB website, they are willing to directly provide samples to OSHA or any other independent tester because they believe their product is formaldehyde free and stand by that claim. I read about testing that was done by BB and they find "trace elements of formaldehyde at a level of less than .0002%" which, quite frankly, could be found in common household items. Clients complain about burning eyes. Um, OK, I've had perms and my eyes burned, and even had some burning of my eyes while getting my hair cut if someone else in the salon is having their nails done. So, based on all of this, I keep the appointment. I determine that FOR ME, this risk is less than going out and eating a Big Mac, so I'm gonna do it.

I go in on 10/8 and have my BB. Yes, my eyes burned a bit during the flat iron stage, just like the stylist warned me it may. Again, not too worried here 'cause I've had the same thing before. I leave, looking quite amazing if I do say so myself, and am totally a believer in the beauty of the Blowout! I can't wait to wash, dry, and fix my hair on my own to see if it really is as easy as she made it look. I anticipate the dust building up on my Chi iron, as it sits, unused in the bathroom drawer!

I happen to get online later that day, and guess what? More information discrediting Oregon OSHA's claims. Now we find that their testing methods were proven faulty. Long story short, a scientist claims that OSHA's testing was measuring "Methylene Glycol" and they just called it formaldehyde. MG is apparently a key ingredient in many salon hair straightening treatments. Also pointed out is that formaldehyde is a gas, and as such, it cannot be added to cosmetics. It may exist in trace amounts, but find me a house that doesn't have lots of products that contain TRACE amounts of it. MG contains TRACE amounts of formaldehyde, a reported 0.05%.

Now, the Freakonomist in me wonders who is bankrolling this scientist that has made these claims, but still...it looks pretty convincing. Still, it is better to keep an open mind, right?

Fast forward to a few days ago. News on BB's site states that an air monitoring study has been done at a salon that offers the BB and the exposure levels are more than six times lower than OSHA's standard for air quality safety.

There seems (TO ME) to be compelling evidence that due to the shift from the norm in Brazilian Blowout's business practices there may be a bit of a grudge to bear. That to me, is motive enough, for someone to send in an "anonymous" sample, tainted with formaldehyde, to get the BB company some negative press. Lord knows that with the Internet and social media like it is, that stuff goes "viral" in no time at all.

It also seems that what we're reading is only PART of the story. Each company can hire "experts" to push through their agenda with statistics. That happens every day in trials all over this country.

However, for me, the most compelling evidence that I have as to the formaldehyde/no formaldehyde controversy is this....

A personal friend of mine had the Brazilian Blowout 4-6 weeks before I had mine. She has a SERIOUS allergy to formaldehyde. This allergy is no joke. This is a "hit her with the epi pen and call 911" kind of allergy.

Before her Brazilian Blowout the stylist called the BB company not once, but twice, and was reassured BOTH times that the company felt confident in their product being formaldehyde free. The stylist and my friend decided to proceed.

My lovely friend had NO reaction to the BB. She didn't even have the stinging of her eyes. Nothing...no epi pen required. She was fine, and her hair looks amazing!

So, there you have it folks...my $0.02 worth of opinion on the Brazilian Blowout. We take health risks every day. Some choose to vaccinate; some decide against it. Some eat processed foods; some stick to organic. Some smoke, drink, or drive too fast. Some eat enough fat in fast food to clog your arteries by next week. Some get their nails done...some lay in a tanning bed...the list can go on and on. But the point is, that we all make those calculated risks based on the knowledge that we have about that risk. Sometimes our knowledge base is low, and sometimes we research and dig deeper and know a little more. But whatever you choose to do, please accept the responsibility of YOUR CHOICE. If you burn yourself on your hot coffee, or if you get skin cancer after tanning for 20 years, that was YOUR CHOICE. It's not someone else's responsibility to pay for the mistakes that we make. We've turned into an insanely litigious society and lack of personal responsibility and accountability is a large reason why.

....I shall get off of my soap box.......for now!

Time Marches On...Are You Marching or Standing Still?

This is a blog post I wrote for my weight loss blog, Bloggin The Bugg. However, I have decided to cross post this on this blog, as it's not just a story about weight loss, but about life. I hope you enjoy.....

A year ago I was, quite frankly, a mess. I was a complete wreck...physically and emotionally. Everything came to a head one night after hitting the wine trail with some friends. A great friend...an old friend...had come along as my "date". After departing the drunk bus, we headed to McDonald's for some grub before heading home. She was staying the night to avoid the drive home, so we knew we'd have some good "girlfriend gab" time. It was just what I needed.

See, I think you have some friends that are surface friends. They see what's on the surface and don't dig any deeper. If you say you're fine...then you're fine and everyone moves on. Then there are those "below the surface" friends. Those are the ones that hear "I'm a friggin mess" when you say "I'm fine" and they DIG...they dig deep baby, 'cause that's the kind of friend they are, and they WANT to help.

Debbie is a "below the surface" friend. We've seen each other through job changes, births, marriage troubles, family troubles, death, and just about any other miserable thing one can endure. Let me say...for the record...Debbie isn't my only "below the surface" friend. I am blessed to have several. But, she was there that night, and she did the digging that led to my return to life.

We started talking about the past 8-9 months. So much had happened in my life...Schuyler (my nephew) was killed in Afghanistan...my Mom died unexpectedly...physically I was a mess on a whole other level. My weight had increased to probably the highest it had ever been. I was severaly depressed but hadn't admitted it to myself. But Debbie asked...she asked how I was.

"Fine...doing ok."

"No, REALLY...how are you DOING?" (this is digging deeper)

I thought about that and ended up breaking down completely. I lost it. I was not fine and it was time to face that.

Debbie and I talked at length that night. Maybe it was having a trusted friend...maybe it was the wine...maybe it was just time...or maybe it was a combination of all of these. But this would end up being the night that changed everything. Debbie encouraged me to talk to someone about medication. She got me to admit that I was depressed...really, really depressed. And she got me to realize that it wasn't getting any better as time went on, but actually getting progressively worse. She helped me realize that I needed help in getting out of the fog.

So, I ended up taking Lexapro to help me deal with the depression. Thankfully that worked really well for me and helped me climb out of the hole that I was stuck in. I made it through the holidays...those first holidays without Schuyler and Mom. I made it to January 2010...a new year and hopefully a happier year.

And what a happier year it's been. Life isn't without sadness...nobody should expect that. But, I have found that HOW you deal with those disappointing or sad times makes a world of difference. I'm not the eternal optimist, but I do try to see something good even in the most difficult of situations. I am trying to look at the simple things in my life that bring me happiness. The year after Schuyler and Mom died there was a LOT of family time...LOTS and LOTS....and those were really happy, really comforting times. The 6 hour drive to visit "home" isn't such a "task" anymore, but a destination where fun times and memories are being made.

Mid-January I decided that my mental health was on the right track so it was time to get my physical heath in check as well. I started this "Fit By Forty" journey, and honestly, I would NEVER have imagined I would be where I am today. In January I weighed 265 pounds. I was wearing a 22/24 and XXL shirt. I THOUGHT I felt pretty good. Then I started losing the weight. Initially I set small goals...at 265 my goal was to be in the 250's. At 259, my goal was to be in the 240's...and so on.

Here I am...the end of September and beating down the door to under 200! I am at 203 as of this morning. I am wearing a 16 jean comfortably, and a 14 is button-able and zippable, but not comfortable! YET. I buy Large shirts. My shoe size has even gotten smaller! From a 9.5 EE to a 8.5 B.

But, the best thing about all this isn't the numbers. It is how I FEEL. I feel energized. I want to go DO something...not just lay low. I am active...I am happy...I am fit.

Life is good.

So, this brings me to the title..."Time Marches On...Are You Marching or Standing Still?".

I was totally standing still in 2009. But 2010? Oh, in 2010 I'm Marching...I'm leading-the-band marching....and it feels GREAT.

Life is hard...nobody should expect it not to be. But how you deal with those curve balls you're thrown will make a HUGE difference in whether or not you march or stand still.

Maybe life is like living in the jungle...the weak, injured animal that stays still is going to be the one to get eaten by the mighty lion. It's OK to be weak and injured, just don't stay still for too long so that the lion has to go elsewhere for his dinner.

L

A Reason...A Season...A Lifetime...

Maybe you've seen the e-mail hundreds of times, and maybe you've even stopped to read it. The passage is trying to explain why people come into your lives and what you get out of it. Everyone comes for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.



I want to talk tonight about someone who was in my life for a reason. The passage says that when someone comes into your life for a reason, it's usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die.



Albus Dumbledog was in my life for a reason...let me tell you about him.



The odds were stacked against Albus from the get go. Someone dumped him on the side of the road....quite possibly along with his litter mates. Somehow, against odds, he made his way to the side of the road...at JUST the right time. He made it there just before my beautiful friend Carolyn drove by.



And against even more odds, Carolyn managed to notice him. And Carolyn, being Carolyn stopped and picked up his tiny, dehydrated, seed tick infested body.....and took him home. There she spent many hours picking the seed ticks off of him and nursing him back to health. But, staying with Carolyn was not in the plan for Albus. Albus had another job.



Now, it also just happens that the first day of PreK for my Avery falls at this time. Avery attends PreK with Jack, Carolyn's son. So it is decided that since Carolyn may have some issues leaving her youngest at PreK, I will take her out to breakfast where we will manage to leave our babes for that 2 hours and 45 minutes until we pick them up!



Carolyn and I head to Panera where we drink coffee and talk about things to keep our minds off of having just left the kids at the big kid school! The discussion moves to how Carolyn's hubby isn't too happy with her, as she's picked up a stray and he thinks they are over their pet quota. Well, being a good friend I ask to see a picture of the new pup...Carolyn in her infinite wisdom tells me this is probably not a good idea, because she's pretty sure one look and I'll be hooked.



THAT is how Albus Dumbledog came to be adopted by the Martin family. That was approximately one year ago. Albus came to us at a very difficult time in my life. I had suffered the loss of my nephew, Schuyler in Afghanistan in February. Then on July 4 my Mom suddenly passed away. Depression was weighing heavy on me and I was generally a mess. I probably needed to add a puppy to the mix like I needed a hole in my head....but really, I DID.



Albus needed someone to get up and take him out in the morning. He didn't care if I'd rather sleep until noon...he had to pee. So, it's get your lazy ass outta bed or I'm gonna pee on your shoe.



I usually got up.



Albus needed to be played with. He didn't care if I was depressed and feeling bad. He needed to play. And who, seriously WHO, can not find even a small amount of joy when tossing a ball over and over and over for a faithful dog that keeps bringing it back and seems as excited the 38th time as he was the first time you tossed it?



So, as Albus aged, I got better. And so begins the "here for a reason" explaination. The depression cloud lifted little by little. I couldn't allow myself the luxury of going back to bed every day...I had to get up and keep going. I started working out again...I started getting healthier. I kept feeling better and better.



Before Schuyler was killed we would "talk" on instant messenger. He would ask me about my workout progress and joke about how we could go for a run when he was home on leave. At that point I wouldn't have been able to run to the freezer for ice cream, let alone go for a run with someone. But, Schuyler being Schuyler would bring it up every time we IM'ed. So, after losing him and losing my Mom and then finally getting back on track with exercising, I tried running. It's not pretty, but I do enjoy it.



I think about them a lot when I run, and I think about what their reaction would be to the changes in me. Because of his influence in my exercise I decided that I would register for the 4 mile run in our hometown of Kewanee over Labor Day weekend. To me, that was kinda like coming full circle...

.....I would do that run in Kewanee, where I would've run with Schuyler

.....I feel like my grief process has come full circle and I am finally able to deal with the situation on my own, without any medication to help keep me from getting sucked down into the hole of depression; my final pills would be taken the week before the race



So I went to the race with one goal in mind...finish the race in under an hour. I finished in 46 minutes and some odd seconds. I did it...I ran with Schuyler in Kewanee. I had come full circle and not let that depression take me out of the game.



That was Saturday. On Sunday, I got the phone call.



Albus had gotten loose and gotten hit by a car.



He was gone.



Suddenly, coming full circle was so clear to me...it truly was full circle, and the thing that came into my life to assist me through a difficulty, to aid me physically and emotionally, was gone. Albus had fulfilled his reason.



And just like that...he was gone.



So now begins another grieving process for my family. I miss that lil' bugger like crazy. I miss the wet kiss to the face at 6 am when he wanted to go out and pee. I miss the way he'd lay with the kids until they were asleep and then follow me around room to room waiting for me to go to bed...then...and only then would he go to sleep. I miss the way he "talked" to us. I miss looking out my kitchen window and seeing him running wild, playing with his friends in the neighbor's fenced in yard. I miss so many things about him, and yet I am not sad when I think of him.



I cannot be sad.



I am so thankful that Albus was in my life for that reason. He totally and completely fulfilled his duties. I'm sure he was entitled to a few extra treats upon his arrival home. He brought joy and laughter to our house in a time that I wondered if we'd ever really laugh again. He helped us see the beauty in surviving.



He was a great dog...one of the best, and I will miss him every day, but I will not be sad...I will only be thankful and grateful for having such a wonderful dog come into my life and do such an important duty. Thank you, Albus Dumbledog...you were a wonderful dog and I'll never forget you. Lassie's got nothing on you, little man.